


The Changing Ocean Tides

by mcgarrygirl78



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drama, F/M, Romance, post-episode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-11
Updated: 2014-10-11
Packaged: 2018-02-20 17:28:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2436944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>No wonder she couldn’t decompress…she was still Prentiss.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Changing Ocean Tides

**Author's Note:**

> I had to write a story for this episode that was in my fanon of Haley living, hence the AU. Not that my other stuff wasn’t kinda AU anyway. I just wanted to post that this about Haley living and I wrote it so that I can continue on in the universe I've been writing for a year now, in which I established that she died when Jack is eight. Spoilers for 100.

Emily checked on Jack once more and he was asleep, just as he was a half hour before. There wasn’t a scratch on him but she kept thinking about Hotch rushing out of the room to find him. She didn’t think she’d get that scene out of her head as long as she lived. Foyet was beaten to a bloody pulp, dead on the living room floor. Haley was upstairs, nearly so. She watched Hotch hold his ex-wife in his arms and beg her to hold on. She watched him fly out of the house, covered in his blood, Haley’s, Foyet’s, to follow the ambulance to Memorial.

There was so much to process, literally and figuratively, it felt like a neverending day. Emily was sure there was more to come. In 48 hours she would be sitting across the table from Erin Strauss. Emily’s stomach dropped just thinking about it. She knew the shrew was going to turn this around on Hotch, as if anyone in his position wouldn’t have done the same thing. Emily felt she would lose her cool just thinking about it.

Face to face was going to be interesting indeed. She gently stroked Jack’s cheek and walked out of the room. In the living room, she double checked the alarm. She grabbed a beer from the fridge and poured herself a glass of wine. In the bedroom, Emily put music that she and Hotch both loved on the stereo. Then she poked her head into the bathroom.

“Are you alright?” she asked. She wanted to ask something else but wasn’t sure what it was. Too much happened today and Emily refused to make it about her.

Haley almost died; it couldn’t be about Emily. The fear of losing Jack was palpable. The fear of losing Hotch was as well. He rushed into that house with no backup. She couldn’t blame him but it scared the hell out of her. Then when the rest of the team arrived she had to be in full Prentiss mode.

Not wanting to pat herself on the back, Emily had done a damn good job. She actually hadn’t even touched Hotch until he and Jack got home about ninety minutes ago. Even though she tried her best, she burst into tears when he held her to him. Her sobs woke Jack, who was also in his father’s arms. The toddler stroked Emily’s hair and told her everything would be alright. She still wasn’t sure about that.

“Derek swears by this Epsom salt bath. If anyone would know, he would…the man tackles people for a living.”

“You’ve been in here for a while. Are you feeling better?”

“I'm trying. I’ll stay here until the water cools.”

Emily nodded, trying to smile. She turned to leave.

“Baby?”

She turned back and saw Hotch’s outstretched hand. Gingerly, she held it in her own. His knuckles were bruised and swollen; Emily stroked her fingers over them. He took a man’s life with his own hands. Would she be able to shake that image when he touched her again? Those tender, beautiful hands that brought her such bliss beat someone to death.

“Are you alright?” Hotch asked, closing his eyes and opening them again.

“I don’t want you worrying about me, Aaron. There are other things that you have to deal with right now.”

“You know what, I love you Emily but you’ve been altruistic above and beyond. For months it’s been ‘don’t worry about me’. I'm actually quite worried about you.”

“I'm fine; I promise.” She lied, gently brushing her lips against his knuckles. “Relax, Hotch.”

“Emily…”

She heard her cell phone ringing and knew it was her mother. She kissed Hotch’s hand again.

“I have to take that phone call.”

Hotch nodded, letting go of her hand. Emily rushed into the bedroom to answer before the voicemail picked up.

“Hello.”

“Emily, you sound out of breath darling, are you alright?”

“Yes mother, I'm alright.”

“I've been watching all of this unfold on CNN. Please tell me that Aaron and Jack are alright.”

“Jack is fine…he doesn’t have a scratch on him. Aaron will recover; he was checked out and released from the hospital. He has a slight concussion but most of his other wounds will be fine with a few days rest. I'm going to make sure he rests.”

“And Haley?” Elizabeth barely whispered her name. “CNN said she was mortally wounded.”

“We thought she was dead.” Emily lowered her voice as well. She didn’t want Hotch to hear her talking about Haley. She didn’t know why she felt that way, just knew that she did. “The entire team was on the line when Foyet shot her. Hotch was ahead of us but we all believed we were too late. When Morgan checked her pulse it was light but it was there. They rushed her out but feared she wouldn’t make it to the hospital.”

“Haley’s alive?”

“She was in surgery for hours; there was extensive damage. It’s touch and go but there are so many people praying for her.”

“I’ll pray for her.” Elizabeth replied. “I'm just so grateful that Jack wasn’t harmed. How are you holding up, Emily?”

“Don’t waste time worrying about me.”

“That ridiculous, I'm most worried about you. You're my daughter and I know how you are. Ever since Aaron was assaulted by that maniac you’ve been carrying all of his weight and your own on your shoulders. I've bitten my tongue, let you take control of your life like the amazing woman I know you to be.”

“But?” Emily couldn’t help the sarcastic bitterness in her tone. She was so tired and it wasn’t over yet. Now they were holding vigil to see if Haley would make it through the night.

“Now I'm telling you that its time to look after yourself. Darling, you're going to fall apart…you're doing too much.”

“I'm fine Mother, I assure you.”

“How many times have you done that?” Elizabeth asked.

“Please stop. I'm telling you that I'm fine and there are other things that need to take precedence.”

“What do you mean? Like the inquiry into the death of George Foyet?”

“How do you find these things out, Mother?” Emily asked, sighing. “Do you have J. Edgar Hoover on speed dial?”

“J. Edgar Hoover is dead, Emily. However Deputy Director Douglas and I have been friends since before you were born.”

Emily watched Hotch come out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel. She shook off the dirty thoughts that automatically ran through her mind. Bumps, bruises, and those horrific stab wounds and he was still her sexy man. She needed to get some weight on him though. The assault and the stress had been hard on Hotch. Emily hated to use the word gaunt but he needed some weight on him. She needed to take him home to his mother and some home-cooked Southern meals.

“Mother, I have to go but I will end our conversation with this. If I find out that you have stuck your nose into any FBI inquiry that may, or may not, take place, if I find out you called Deputy Director Douglas to inquire about the weather or his well-being, you and I will have a misunderstanding. Our misunderstandings are never a good thing, am I right?”

“Erin Strauss has it out for Aaron.” Elizabeth reasoned.

“And you think your getting involved is going to help how?” Emily asked. “Our relationship is under the radar, you butting your nose in will send up red flags. Stay out of it; we’ll handle whatever we need to handle. We always have. I mean it.”

“Alright.”

“Mother…”

“I promise to stay out of it.” Elizabeth said.

“Thank you. I need to go now.”

“I love you, Emily. Please give Aaron and Jack my love.”

“I will. I love you too, Mother; goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

“Mother sends her love.” Emily said, clicking her phone to vibrate.

“And apparently something that might cause a misunderstanding between the two of you.” Hotch replied. He dropped his towel and pulled on the sweatpants at the bottom of the bed. Then he took a Fordham University tee shirt out of his top drawer. There was little chance of him ever going topless again.

“Don’t worry about it; she was properly warned.”

“I honestly admit to loving the idea of seeing your mother and Strauss go at each other. I mean, not in a late night Cinemax kinda way but…”

“Oh my God, honey,” Emily held up her hand. “I get it; I really get it. Now what I need to do is get that image out of my mind. I need to do that quickly.”

“Keep drinking, baby.” Hotch said, managing a little smile.

“I think I will.” Emily picked up her wine glass.

“I'm going to check on Jack.”

“Yeah, I've already done that three times. He’s sound asleep.”

“I know,” Hotch nodded. He leaned over to kiss Emily’s lips. “I’ll be back.”

When he left the room Emily realized that she was fully dressed. No wonder she couldn’t decompress…she was still Prentiss. Sighing, she drank the rest of her wine and started taking off her clothes.

Hotch stood in Jack’s doorway and just stared at him. He was cuddled under his blanket with Constable Bear, his sleeping companion. He’d been through so much these past few months, and especially today, but he slept like a baby. When they got back to the apartment, Hotch helped the toddler into his pajamas and into bed.

“I need to say my prayers, Daddy.”

“Of course.”

Jack put his hands together and Hotch put his hands over Jack’s.

“Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die, before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.”

“Amen.” Aaron whispered.

“I'm not done yet.” Jack looked at him.

“Oh, I'm sorry. Go on.”

“Dear God, look after Mommy, Daddy, Nana, Grandpa Tug, Grandma, Aunt Jessie, Emily, Steve, the whole BAU, and Uncle Jason too. Amen.”

“Amen.” Hotch replied.

He tucked Jack into bed and kissed his forehead.

“Can we see Mommy tomorrow?” he asked.

“I don’t know, buddy, she's going to need a lot of rest so she can get better.”

“She's not going to D-I-E, is she Daddy? George said she would but she won't, will she?”

Hotch did his best to hold back his emotions. He couldn’t stop hearing those gunshots in his head. The way Haley told him to tell Jack things; to keep her and their love alive in his heart. They needed her and she was a fighter but Hotch just didn’t know. He and Haley made a promise to always be as honest as they could with Jack. It hadn’t been easy, like when their marriage was falling apart.

“Jack, we just need to pray and think good thoughts. You know that Mommy will do everything in her power to come back to you. Still, sometimes…just think good thoughts, OK?”

“OK, Daddy, I’ll think good thoughts. I promise.”

Hotch walked into the bedroom and sat down on the edge of his bed. He didn’t want to wake him but couldn’t help stroking his face. The fear of losing him…it was all too much. Hotch thought he knew what was coming but never let his mind really go there, to what could happen. He was afraid it would drive him insane. What happened today almost had.

Knowing Foyet was close to his family, close enough to touch, made Hotch nauseous. He took a deep breath, kissed Jack, and left the room. In the bedroom, Emily listened to Carly Simon and had another glass of wine. He smiled when she handed him the big bottle of Excedrin PM.

“Baby, you always know what I need.”

“If you wash it down with beer, it'll kick in faster.”

“My liver and the lining of my stomach sincerely thank you.” Hotch took two pills and washed them down with half the warming Stella Artois. That would probably be enough. All he wanted was to crawl between those sheets and slip into a deep sleep. Nothing was ever that easy.

“Come to bed, Aaron.”

That was all she needed to say. Hotch turned off the stereo, the lamp, and slipped under the covers. Emily went to pull him close but he resisted.

“What's the matter?” She asked.

“You’ve been holding onto me for a long time now. I could never put my appreciation into words but its time for me to return the favor.”

“This relationship has never been about reciprocity, at least that kind. We both hold onto each other.”

“So you don’t want me to hold you?” he asked.

Emily pulled him close, kissing him deeply. Hotch wrapped his arms around her.

“I love you, baby, I love you so much.”

“I love you too.” She caressed his face. The physical wounds would heal. Emily was unsure of everything else. Time would tell, as they say. She hated that saying.

“I wouldn’t have gotten through this without you. Every step of the way, you were there. You held on, you never gave up; you are so damn amazing.”

“I don’t want credit, Aaron; it’s just what you do when you love someone. I'm always going to have your back. Every promise I've made to you, I plan to keep.”

“Ditto.”

They settled in bed, Emily, holding him in her arms. Hotch rested his head close to her breast, his hand moving under her tee shirt to caress her skin. It wasn’t over; there was still a journey ahead. Strauss most likely wanted his head on a stick. Haley was fighting an uphill battle for her life. Hotch took something to sleep but prayed that his slight concussion didn’t cause him to slip into a coma. He feared Jack would have nightmares about demons and bad men.

“Did the bath work?” She asked, stroking her fingers through his hair.

“It did. I don’t have much faith in tomorrow though, I can admit that. When you hold me I feel invincible, even if it’s an illusion.”

“Go to sleep, Mr. Invincible.”

“One of these days we’re going to have a long talk.” Hotch replied.

“Yes, but not tonight. Tonight you need to sleep. You'll want to get to the hospital early to check on Haley.”

“I need another goodnight kiss.” Hotch replied.

Emily smiled, complying. Hotch deepened it, moving up on the bed. She pulled away, breathless, and kissed Hotch’s nose.

“You need to sleep, Aaron Hotchner, now.” Emily did her best to put on a stern tone.

Hotch sighed, caressing her face. He would never have the words. Her strength, her bravery, her resolve, her love…surely he was hardly worth it. Thank God she felt differently.

“This side is tender; I'm going to lie on this one.”

“Alright.”

Hotch turned on his other side; Emily spooned behind him. Her arm slipped around his waist and he took firm hold of her hand. He would go to his dreams but didn’t plan to go there alone. Emily would be with him; she would always be with him. As long as he never let go.

***


End file.
